Worse Than Kool-aid!

The games have begun! In today's issue of the Journal & Topics, we read two interesting items. The first is an article about the amazing disappearing council agenda item regarding council decorum:


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It seems the city council has more than one whiny cry baby occupying a seat. It appears the 5th Ward's Benedict-Alderman Ryan went running to the Mayor to wail about a personal email from the 1st Ward's Alderman Schmidtzkrieg that he didn't like, and the Mayor was willing to place the item on the city council agenda for public discussion. We understand that Benedict-Alderman Ryan isn't used to being strongly challenged either publicly or privately, but we had no idea he was such a remarkable cry baby.

According to Mayor Fri-nocchio, he pulled the item from the council agenda because he was afraid the meeting would last too long. Since that entire city council meeting was about 30 minutes in length, we feel Mayor Fri-nocchio must have pulled the agenda item for other reasons. And we are digging in to find out why.

The second item of interest is a letter from 1st Ward resident Dave Kemerer:


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Mr. Kemerer accuses Alderman Schmidtzkrieg of having a "penchant for loose rhetoric." It appears to us that Mr. Kemerer has a penchant for "loose truths." As an attorney, Mr. Kemerer should know better than to declare something unconstitutional before a court has declared something unconstitutional. But we feel the crux of the matter for Mr. Kemerer is not necessarily the truth involved with the constitutionality of a recall ordinance as much as it may be his desire to spin the message and provide his pals with cover.

It appears to us that Mr. Kemerer isn't any better with numbers than he is with his treatment of the truth. The final vote to approve the density variance for Norwood's condominium project was 4 to 3. Schmidtzkrieg was joined in voting "no" by Aldermen Wsooooolman and DreadBach. So, in fact, "the rest of the council" did not "conclude" that the density variance was justified.

Mr. Kemerer also seems extremely concerned that Alderman Schmidtzkrieg may run for mayor - something Schmidtzkrieg himself has said he is not doing, much to the PRU Crew's disappointment.

We wonder what Mr. Kemerer is "running" for?

In any case, what is going on here is that the Usual Suspects Club is cranking up the smear and spin machine. It's of vital importance that a representative with populist appeal gets knocked down and dragged around so that the politically connected can have their way with public policy.

It's nothing more than absolute bullshit.

It Ain't Over Til...

As we expected, last night the city council voted 4 (Allspaghetti, Benedict Ryan, Lord of the Manor and Carey the Unfriendly Ghost) to 3 (Schmidtzkrieg, Wsoooool man, DreadBach) in favor of giving Norwood's Park Ridge 2004 LLC the density variance for the 8 additional condo units.

Again, it was Aldermen Schmidt and Wsol who led the effort to not only keep the development within the parameters of the new and more lenient zoning code, but also tighten up the language on the ordinance regarding the "senior housing" component and ensure that the city not get handed the final bill for the water retention.

The language in the ordinance remains full of loopholes "big enough to drive a condo through", largely due to the parliamentary maneuverings of the Lord of the Manor and the stupidity of his fellow Aldermorons.

There were 13 comments from the gallery; 4 of those comments were in support of the project. Again, Carla Owen addressed the council and "updated" the petitions she and her Berry Pky. neighbors have been collecting in opposition to the code variances for the Norwood project. Those petition signers now number around 500.

To no avail.

The preferences and will of the majority of residents in the immediate area of Executive Office Plaza and throughout the city have been ignored.

Get used to it.

Haunted Senior Housing!

'Twas Halloween day, and all through the town,
Not a creature was sure of what would go down;

The council would meet in just five more short days
And Norwood was hoping they'd hear four "okays".

The children in costumes were ringing door bells,
And some folks were saying, "We think Norwood's plan smells."

And Norwood was reading Park Ridge Underground,
Maybe looking for info. that's floating around?

Well here is our take, if you really must know;
We think the new ordinance really does blow.

The City Attorney said that he wrote it again,
And that by consensus he left the "out" clauses in.

Now, we don't recall hearing Aldermen speak
About the "out" clauses as something they seek.

As a matter of fact, we distinctly recall
Five of the Aldermen were not pleased at all!

The variance being sought for the density,
Is based largely on the senior amenity.

So it seems a bit odd, if not totally queer
That the new ordinance is not a lot more austere.

But we're pretty sure that just like last time,
Allegretti and Ryan will think it's just fine.

So for this fine Halloween that is our story to tell.
We'll leave it at that and hope all does go well.

Prepare for Glory!

Approximately 400 residents affixed their signatures to petitions asking that the mayor and city council adhere to the city's new zoning code, and refuse to grant variances in density and height for Norwood's Park Ridge 2004 LLC condominium project. Those 400 residents will probably be ignored.

Mayor Jerkxes, being aided and abetted by developer-loyalist and Benedict-Alderman, Robert Ryan, as well as Park Ridge 2004 LLC investor, John Chipman, have purportedly persuaded the Lord of the Manor, Rich DiPietro, to give Norwood the variance on density they've asked for.

The propaganda remise that again will be thrust at the community in support of this project will be the mysticism of senior housing and a 1-acre park that is unlikely to be used by anyone outside of the condominium development. The neighborhood kids who now use that area, which is already owned by the city, will have to find another venue for their winter sledding fun.

Sources tell us the Lord of the Manor will be satisfied with enforcement of the zoning code's height restrictions on the project, but is willing to give Norwood the density variance for the 8 additional units they want. And why not? It's not as if the bulk of the extra traffic created by this already dense project will be experienced by residents in the 2nd ward. As we all know, "Stop Means Stop", but only as posted for the traffic in the 2nd ward. The concept of "Stop Means Stop" does not appear to apply to the Park Ridge zoning code.

It also appears "no" doesn't mean "no" the first time the city council says it. After the first city council vote, Norwood's partners said they would go back and work on their plan. However, it appears they spent the majority of their time and effort working on the aldermen.

Tonight's city council meeting will be a long and drawn-out battle between those who demand adherence to Park Ridge's new and more lenient zoning code, and those who feel entitled to ignore the demands of the law and the will of the residents in the Park Ridge community.

Barring any last minute epiphanies, the aldermen will probably vote 4 to 2 in favor of Norwood; DreadBach is expected to be absent from the meeting. That vote count will save Mayor Jerkxes from having to cast a tie-breaking vote before the serf-izens of Park Ridge; another reason why the Lord of the Manor has been so thoroughly courted for his vote.

Mayor Jerkxes, "may you live forever." - Leonidas , '300'

Out of the Closet!

One of Norwood's Park Ridge 2004 LLC principal investors has finally come out of the closet! John Chipman, former resident and Park Ridge alderman, is finally Living Out Loud! Mr. Chipman has proudly declared to the world his orientation as an investor in a Letter to the editor :: Park Ridge Herald-Advocate.

After three years of being a closeted investor, Mr. Chipman was outted by the city's disclosure of onwership.pdf requirement. We wonder why it took so long! We're sure Mr. Chipman feels relieved to be able to finally speak openly about who and what he is.

Mr. John Chipman is now a man on a mission! Not only is he telling everyone who will listen about his pride in being an openly invested principal in Norwood's EOP project, he is also encouraging the community to embrace what he and his fellow investors are offering - a condominium project that exceeds the zoning code for density and height, and offers almost nothing in the way of real amenities to the rest of the community.

Of course, we all understand that while the community is being asked to embrace this project, Mr. Chipman and his fellow similarily oriented investors will be hoping to embrace bigger profits.

We Heard It Through The Grapevine.

Norwood's condo plan was again deferred by the city council on Monday night. We hear Norwood's Park Ridge 2004 LLC has a lobbying ally on the city council.

Ever the development loyalist, we hear Alderman Robert Ryan is doing his best to engineer a council majority to give Norwood a variance or two. With Ryan's long-standing relationships in the building community, we are not surprised by this turn of Norwood's fortunes.

Without further ado, we offer to you our melodious tribute to Alderman Ryan -

For those of you who need or appreciate bad, really really bad, karaoke accompaniment, this link is for you!

Heard It Through The Grapevine

You can right click it, click open in a new window, then minimize it. Enjoy!

Ooh, we bet you wonder how we know
About you're plan to make a go
With Norwood's guys lookin' to make more dough.
Between Norwood and you it's
A dog and pony show.
It wasn't a surprise we must say,
When we found out yesterday.
Don't you know...

(Chorus)
We heard it through the grapevine
Not much backbone up in your spine.
Oh we heard it through the grapevine,
Cause some folks sure do like to drop a dime.
Robbie, Robbie, yeah.

We know voters ain't supposed to cry,
But you're leaving yours high and dry.
Choosin' you to represent their views
Means that now they're really screwed.
You could have told them yourself
That you shill for someone else.
Instead...

(Chorus)
They heard it through the grapevine
Not much backbone up in your spine.
Oh we heard it through the grapevine,
Cause some folks sure know where to drop a dime.
Robbie, Robbie, yeah.

People say believe half of what you see,
Some, and none of what you hear.
We can't help bein' confused
If it's true please tell us dear.
Do you plan to still vote "no"
Or, sell out on the new zoning code?
Don't you know...

(Chorus)
We heard it through the grapevine
Not much backbone up in your spine.
Oh we heard it through the grapevine,
Oh we had hoped you wouldn't be a slime.
Robbie, Robbie, yeah.

Hold 'em.

Tonight's city council meeting won't be a full house, leaving Norwood's Park Ridge 2004 LLC to consider their odds of winning the EOP Lowball poker game.

Norwood is said to have asked the city council to delay consideration of their PUD, but proceed with the zoning map amendment approval. The council will probably delay both action items.

Norwood's pocket rockets can't win the game, leaving Norwood to check their bet, while they hope for a live hand.

The Floorman will do his best to assist Norwood's shill, but tonight's round of betting is likely to be a tight game.

The showdown is probably still to come.